Putting the Potato in Macho Potato
by gregek
Summary: How do you get kids to eat their vegetables? Just ask the awesome Prussia! Based on the Legend of the Potato King.


This one-shot is based on the Legend of the Potato King. I just thought it would be too cute to write my own version with Prussia and Germany in it! :D

I do not own Hetalia, its storyline, or any of its characters.

* * *

"Come on, try it."

"No."

"It'll give you super-special-awesome superpowers!"

"No!"

"Come on!"

"Nein."

"For the awesome me?! PLEASE?!"

"Nein!"

Ah, the joys of being a big brother. Prussia would know them for sure. He loved his little brother Germany more than life itself. He's just too cute and awesome for his own good! Of course, everything has its ups and downs. Like...right now.

A new super-special-awesome food had come to Europe straight from the New World. It had been there for a while now and spread from country to country over the years. It was cheap, delicious, and most importantly...nutritious. Potatoes would be the super-special-awesome food everyone would love, right?

Right?! Blue eyes narrowed. "I'm not eating this gross dirt-covered thing!"

"You never tried it West!" Prussia frowned. "Besides, it's delicious!"

Did that change the little boy's mind? "NEIN!" Yeah...no. "I won't eat that even if there is nothing else to eat! You can't make me!" And said little boy proceeded to stomp out of the room, shoulders squared and brows furrowed.

"Scheiße! What is the awesome me to do?!" Asking nicely didn't work. Commanding didn't work. Persuasion didn't work—oh wait! A crimson glimmer lit up in scarlet eyes as a sinister chuckle left pale lips. The awesome Prussia knew what to do now!

The awesome Prussia had an awesome plan to hatch!

* * *

"What's this?"

The soldiers standing in formation, guarding a patch of land with stern expressions of their faces had definitely caught Germany's eye. One step in the wrong direction, and goodbye intruder. Just what was going on?

Without a single hint of fear, Germany went up to one of the men. "What are you doing?"

"We were told to protect this field with our lives." Curiosity piqued.

Another nodded. "No one is allowed to trespass. What is stored here is worth more than everyone in this village combined."

"...I see." The little boy walked away, seeming disinterest coloring his voice.

Just what was there?

* * *

A sole small shadow flew in the night into the heavily fortified field. Yet it was just too easy to break in. _Far_ too easy.

Coast clear. No one else was in sight. Seeing that, little fingers dug into the loose soil. What was in there? Buried treasure?

Scoop upon scoop of dirt was displaced until small hands struck gold. Well, more of a brown color to be precise. And the surface was bumpy yet smooth. And there were roots coming out of it. A tuber, huh? Well, since there were so many soldiers guarding a full field of this stuff, it must be precious, right?

And the sole small shadow flew right out only seconds later. Moments later, a multitude of longer larger shadows crept into the heavily-fortified-not-actually-heavily-fortified-field and proceeded to loot it.

Little did all of them know, there were eyes watching over the land. Eyes that were glued onto what was happening before them.

"Remember what the awesome me said?"

"You said to go easy on them at night, right?"

"Exactly!"

"But why sir?"

"Oh you'll see. Kesesese..."

* * *

"More please!"

It was a wonder how Prussia was able to cook amidst the flood of tears overflowing from his eyes. Joyful tears.

Plates upon plates littered the dining table. Empty plates. Empty plates that had been cleaned of their contents.

With a wide grin on his face, Prussia delivered yet another serving of Bratkartoffeln. As soon as it hit the table, Germany tore straight into it. "This is so delicious!"

"Why yes it is super-special-awesome little brother of mine!" Yet the taste of victory was far more delicious. He got the stubborn little boy to eat potatoes and not only him, but all of the people in his land were chowing on the tasty tubers as well!

And that's why centuries and a massive growth spurt later, Germany came to be known as "Macho Potato" to a certain South Italian.

THE END

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How was it? Please leave a little review telling me what you thought!

Oh, and if you like my work, be sure to check out KH freak 813's work! She is a good friend of mine in college and I want to help her out. I also really love her Itapan stories hence why so many of them are in my community "Axis Flower Pair". That, and she asked me. Please be nice though; she is under a lot of stress because she decided it would be a terrific idea to take a crap ton of difficult college courses. Anyways, check out her work and tell her I sent you! (:


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